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I stayed home today. I feel sick, and tomorrow I'm gonna have to ask all my teachers what we did in class. Oi what a hassle. But I still have voice lessons today. I'm excited but my nose is stuffy which makes my voice sound weird. So, whatever. I'm listening to Evanesence. But it's their older stuff. My voice sounds like theirs. So I'm trying to get my voice to sound normal again. Right now I'm trying to remember what I was thinking about yesterday. It was something like how astonished I was that my math class was my favorite place to be in the whole school...I don't know why, but it is. I feel good in there.
Somtimes when I feel alone, more so then normal in my bed I place my hand to my stomach, just to feel my own heartbeating. It's a weird thing that I do, I know, but I do it anyway. It makes me feel less alone for some reason. Maybe because when I do that I can pretend I'm not alone at all. I can pretend I have the life I want. Someone ideal to share the bed with and a much smaller someone depending on me. Some I love before I even meet them or hold them in my arms. Have you ever done that? Probably not. I'm odd so I understand if you've never done any of the things I ask you if you've done. *sighs* I...I just want a child. They don't even have to be mine. But I need a child in the house, or someone I can go to that has a child. I'm in one of those maternal moods if you can't tell. Though only Fange' knows I have these moods. These times when I just need a child to talk to an hold on to. To make me feel like I'm doing something important....finally. Matter of fact, want to see the baby I love the most? Here:

It's blurry, so it doesn't do her justice. But she's a beautiful little girl. Telling you her name would be stupide, on my part, so you don't get to know. I watched her on monday and it was so great taking care of her. Watching her walk all around the house and play with her toys. Feeding her was an adventure! *smiles* I loved it though. So anyway.

Now I'm writing down some lyrics. They aren't my own, so don't get any ideas. I think I'll post again later today.

TWMA,

Sacred Secret