A Tale Of Unfortunate Events

Wow. That's all I've got really. I can't say more, unless I want to become that horrible person I strive so hard to go against. I do not, want to be that person. I don't want to be the person that is looked at as "selfish" or "bitchy" or other unpleasantness. I want to be the person you can lean on and tell your darkest secrets to. I want to be the person who can make you forget all of your troubles and worries. Take them onto myself and fix your whole world. That's what I want.

However.

This isn't going to happen.

I will never be the one to shelter you from the rain.

Never be the one to hold you close for warmth and comfort.

Never be the one to wipe away your tears and tell you not to fret because I'm going to fix it all.

I'm not good enough to be that person.

Apparently, I didn't pick the right numbers. I lost the lotto and I can't go back.

So I'm going to give up, and whatever happens from here is just...meant. I guess. Because I don't want to continue to be stepped on and dragged through the mud. I don't want to do things with you that I hate. I don't want to tell you things that aren't true just because you want to hear them. I'm not going to stop doing things just because you don't like it. I'm not going to agree because it makes you feel better. I'm going to tell you the truth.

Of course, every once in a while, my merciful nature will come into play.

It will cease my harsher words and create soothing ones for me to whisper to you. To ease your distress and heartache. IT will come in and whisper over my lips and onto your skin like a soothing balm. But I will reign myself in. I have been too long your carpet. I have been your pet too often. The roles must switch if they will not be played correctly.

Now.

I'm going to try and pursue something worthwhile. Something I want.

I want to be a model. I want to see Celtic Women in concert. I want to go o the mall with my friends. I want someone I can trust to accept me for who I am and what I do. What I want. What I need. I want to get as much as I give.

"It is better to be hurt by the truth, than comforted by a lie."

I'm unveiling the truth.

And it burns me.

TWMA,

Sacred Secret