Nothing To Do With Me.

The following poem/thingy has nothing to do with me, though I did write it. This is the morbid poem thingy I was talking about yesterday and don't worry about me because I like life too much for me to do any of the things listed in the following poem. Okay? All of those I know that may freak out about this please don't worry 'cause like I said I like life too much for this to happen. I think the only person I've talked about this poem to is "The Counselor" and he said it scared him too. But I explained it to him and now he understands. But he also only read the unedited version. I don't think this version is as scary. So...here goes...

"My Note"

Created By: Sacred Secret

I ran all the possibilities through my head
I wrote them down in script.
I thought about the people that would be affected
But figured my pain was greater
Than any, they could know.
I did it very quiet
I left them in the dark
The paper lay beside the spot where I would fall.
For a moment more I thought of them
The people I held close.
Of all the good times and the smiles
I thought of all the children I had yet to have
The significant other that would never hold me close
I thought of my Mother and what she would think when they found me
My Father and his tears.
Then the darkest angel came into my thoughts.
Their face blurred my vision and they whispered my name
I trembled and lost control of my legs.
Tears streamed down my cheeks
I screamed
“Don’t come any closer! You have done enough!”
And they stared in disbelief
I brought it to my head
Felt it swirl in my loose grasp
I pressed the cold steel to my temple
And adjusted my grip
“Please...”
They whispered as I closed my eyes
“This can’t go on you’ve hurt me enough.”
I said calmly
As my baby sisters little hands reached up at me in my mind
For the last time.
I heard my older brothers deep laugh and remembered the vibration in his chest from it.
For the last time.
I opened my eyes and stared straight at my dark angel
I told them to look
Look at what they have done.
I told them not bring another this fate.
And I released the blast into my own head.
I saw the ceiling
I could hear my dark angel scream my name
I saw my blood pool around me
Felt it mat my hair
Then I was cold and that was the last I felt.
I saw my baby sister again
I saw my brothers disapproving frown.
Saw my Mother and Father curled into themselves bawling.
I saw my dark angel and me on the swings of the schoolyard.
Saw myself as a child.
And in that moment I actually
Regretted Everything.
As I continued falling into what seemed to be an increasing cold
I wished I could go back if only for a moment
And rewrite my note…
But now I can’t
And this is what I have left them…

“Dear those I thought cared,
How could you have been so cold? Didn’t you care?
Obviously not or else, I would still be sitting there talking to you instead of you reading this smiling. Though you’re probably enjoying this, watching my blood seep from my wounds to pool at your feet. I hope you have fun at the party celebrating my death.
To My Angel, I sincerely hope…
You take full blame.”

There you have it. Please don't freak out, as I said. Take it in, and comment. Thank You.

TWMA,

Sacred Secret

P.S: I actually edited this poem. I don't ever edit anything most of the time.